【】1. The Emotional Intelligence Badge
我要评论It's official -- and weirdly radical-- the Boy Scouts of America will now welcome girls. 。
The Scouts announced on Wednesday that it will soon drop the word "boy" from its namesake program and begin to welcome older girls into the Eagle Scouts. The announcement sent a shockwave of terror through alt-right Twitter, leading right-wing bots and Jordan Peterson egg avatar types to claim that America is dead.。
BREAKING: It is not. Instead, the Boy Scouts reformed for the better. The proof is in these new, modern masculine Scouts badges they'll all soon have to earn. 。
SEE ALSO:Homeless Girl Scouts aim to sell 6,000 boxes of cookies in New York City 。While the Scouts have yet to *officially* embrace these badges I just made up, they will be happening -- according to my seven-year-old cousin who promised to make his troop leader do it 。 or else. 。
Scouts who are both currently serving and male: if you have any hope of becoming an Eagle Scout, you're going to have to werk for these badges. Rex Tillerson, this means you. 。
Via Giphy 。Via Giphy 。
1. The Emotional Intelligence Badge 。
This Emotional Intelligence Badge will be a particularly hard one to procure. To qualify, a male Scout must ask his fellow female Scout "how her day is going" and then actually listen to her reply. He is not permitted to yammer on about his own day unprompted.。
2. The Silence Badge 。
By signing up you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.。
Thanks for signing up! 。
3. The Bed Frame Badge 。
This badge is for Scouts who pledge to buy a bed frame in their twenties and not just throw some dumb futon mattress on the floor. 。
4. The Basketbeta Badge 。
To qualify for the Basketbeta Badge, interested Scouts must be able to play multiple games of co-educational basketball without throwing all their passes to fellow boy players or declaring that girl athletes aren't as good. 。
5. The Whole Foods Badge 。
This badge is for Scouts who are able to go at least three lunch periods without squirting a bunch of gross condiments together before swallowing them and insisting that "it's funny!"。" 。6. The Winter Pants Badge 。
Via Giphy 。
The Winter Pants Badge is awarded to Scouts who don't need to declare their masculinity by wearing shorts in the winter and demanding that they're "NOT COLD." 。
7. The Movie Minimizer Badge 。
Many young boys struggle to watch an action movie and not narrate every single detail of the movie after they view it. Scout leaders will grant the Movie Minimizer Badge to kids who successfully view a movie and choose to keep their movie summaries brief. 。
8. The Ding-Dong-Dang Badge 。
The Ding-Dong-Dang Badge will be given to Scouts who make it through 20 minutes of a Scout meeting without cracking a dick joke. 。9. The Well, Actually Badge 。
9. The Well, Actually Badge 。
Via Giphy 。
The "Well, Actually" Badge is offered to bright young Scouts who maintain a record of academic excellence without ever starting a sentence with "Well, Actually" or quoting Neil DeGrasse Tyson.。
10. The Girl Scout Badge 。
The Girl Scout Badge will be awarded to Scouts who welcome girls into their troop without bragging that Boy Scouts have better trips. The Girl Scout badge will be awarded to boys who hold themselves to the same high ethical standards Girl Scouts always have. 。Featured Video For You 。Featured Video For You。Dogs are a treasure and this GPS will help ensure you never lose yours 。
相关文章
'The Flying Bum' aircraft crashes during second test flight
Airlander 10, the world's largest aircraft, on Wednesday crashed at its Cardington Airfield base in2025-04-03Moto Z3 Play review: A decent midrange Android phone for only $500
The OnePlus 6 should be at the very top of your list if you're on a budget of about $500-$600. Howev2025-04-03'The Notebook' anniversary: Film spotlighted an important issue
Prepare the tissues: Monday marks the 14th anniversary of Nicholas Sparks' romantic novel, The Noteb2025-04-03Bomb squad called into airport, finds cute rabbit instead
In this day and age, you know you're not meant to leave your baggage unattended in airports. Especia2025-04-03Olympian celebrates by ordering an intimidating amount of McDonald's
It's no secret that Olympians have to eat clean for years to ensure they're at peak physical conditi2025-04-03World Cup manager wins the heart of the internet, becomes glorious meme
Some people simply seem destined for internet fame. 。Prince Harry running off mid-interview. Daniel R2025-04-03
最新评论